For me, middle school was a complete crapshoot. There were bullies, puberty and that sweeping awkwardness accompanying all social interactions. I am pretty sure middle school is the place where you gain all the painful memories that you go to counseling for in your 30s. Middle school was also the time when I loved the band Creed — not all wounds are created equal. Beyond the first kiss, first sip of alcohol and unrelenting quest for coolness, there is one moment from those days that I remember with an odd salience. The memory concerns my churlish seventh grade math teacher. He was somewhere between Severus Snape and Attila the Hun. (Well, at least to my young imagination.) Two months after the societal rupturing of 9/11, this teacher stood in front of a group of oddly quiet teenagers and said, “You are who you are when you stand in the road, naked in the middle of the night.” You can guess what came next. That kid who had learned the art of classroom humor as a way to … [Read more...]
A pastoral confession about fall programming
Hey, hey you! Yes YOU! Come a little closer (not closer than six feet though) — I need to keep my voice down. Can I tell you a secret? Honestly, it is a little embarrassing. OK, so can you keep a secret? Good, good. Deep breath. Here we go: I have not planned much beyond this week’s worship. I do not have a plan for fall programming. I did a back-to-school blessing. I considered that Advent is coming quickly. But there is no plan. Truly, I cannot believe I just said this on the internet. Dear readers, you need to understand, I am a planner through and through. I have a plan for everything. I have lists everywhere categorized into a neat little system. I have master lists for when I go camping, for holiday traditions at home, for planting season. I have a color-coded calendar for work and for home and they merge beautifully on a calendar app. I sent my spouse a picture of my lists yesterday, and he replied, “Separate them, they are being too fruitful in their … [Read more...]
One body
We are one body, so the Bible says. “If one member suffers, all suffer together; if one member is honored, all rejoice together.” COVID-19 has brought with it many painful lessons. COVID-19 has unearthed just-below-the-surface realities that were glaringly evident pre-pandemic to many in our world (food insecurity, inaccessible healthcare, living a paycheck away from financial disaster, no paid sick leave). COVID-19 has relentlessly revealed just how vulnerable we are physically, economically, socially. COVID-19 has also brought home to me the truth of our interconnectedness. As it turns out, we are, in fact, one body — whether we like it or not. When one part of the world gets the coronavirus, the rest of the world, eventually, will be infected too. I confess that in February I felt immune. China, after all, is very far away. Other horrific diseases had come and gone without breaching our borders, surely this one would stay away too. In March I assumed we would spend a few weeks at … [Read more...]
Order of worship — September 20, 2020
You are welcome to use this liturgy in your online worship services and distribute it to your congregation. It is free for worship use. Please credit Jill Duffield of the Presbyterian Outlook. Download the PDF of the full order worship: Liturgy 09_20_20 … [Read more...]
Yearning to sing, yearning to breathe
Selah. This mysterious little word is sprinkled throughout the psalms. My colleagues tell me that its origin and translation are uncertain and cryptic. Likely it is a kind of marker, delineating thought and suggesting performance, like a poetic or musical caesura — a pause, a connective suspension, an in-between place, a breath. One of my favorite six minutes of music is a recording by Duke Ellington called “Diminuendo and Crescendo in Blue.” It launches out of the gate, hurling spectacular blues choruses with blistering energy. As it travels, it sobers — instruments fall by the wayside, texture and dynamics recede, reaching a nadir: the briefest of piano solos by Ellington himself is suspenseful, eerie, strange. It fades… the moment is held… and then music is back, gathering strength, unbelievably vital, teeming, almost delirious with ideas and voices. But at the center, that mysterious piano solo and pause. Selah. There is a dramatic and painful selah in our worship life … [Read more...]
Creative ministry during pandemic grief
My study leave this year looked different than a conference, or even sermon series planning. I used my study leave to catch up on all the articles I’ve been meaning to get to during this COVID-19 craziness. That meant I read about everything from church conflict to air ventilation during this past week. And in that odd range of topics, I also found time to read the article in the Harvard Business Review titled, “That Discomfort You are Feeling is Grief.” If you have not read it, I highly recommend it. As I gave myself time to really read this article (rather than skim it, which I admittedly find myself rushing to do most of the time), the following words brought actual tears to my eyes: “Finally, it’s a good time to stock up on compassion. Everyone will have different levels of fear and grief and it manifests in different ways. A coworker got very snippy with me the other day and I thought, ‘That’s not like this person; that’s how they’re dealing with this. I’m seeing their … [Read more...]
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