Looking into the lectionary
16th Sunday after Pentecost (Proper 19)
24th Sunday in Ordinary Time
Matthew 18:21-35
September 13, 2026
“What happens when the menu at the church potluck includes such unwelcome entries as rage, hatred, and betrayal?” asks Thomas Long in his Matthew commentary from the Westminster Bible Companion.
Conflict is baked into being human. We annoy and disappoint one another. We misunderstand, betray and wound — sometimes without meaning to, sometimes with more calculation than we would like to admit. And the church, for all its hymns, prayers and hospitality, is no exception. We are a community of ordinary people trying, and often failing, to love well.
Jesus knows this. Matthew 18 could almost be described as Jesus’ “Book of Order” — a collection of teachings about how the community of faith is to live together. Jesus addresses leadership, care for those who are vulnerable, what to do when someone sins against another member of the community, and what reconciliation requires when conflict inevitably erupts.
Immediately before this week’s passage, Jesus gives a process for addressing harm that sounds simple but asks a great deal of us: Go directly to the person who has hurt you. Speak honestly. Listen earnestly. Bring others into the conversation only if needed; the goal throughout is not punishment or public humiliation, but restoration. Jesus imagines a community willing to do the difficult work required to bring people back into right relationship.
In verse 21, Peter, perhaps looking for a more manageable policy, asks Jesus for a number: “Lord, if my brother or sister sins against me, how often should I forgive? As many as seven times?”
Seven sounds generous. Seven means Peter is already imagining repeated offenses and repeated acts of grace. But Jesus refuses to let forgiveness become something we can track on a spreadsheet: “Not seven times, but, I tell you, seventy-seven times.”
In other words, stop counting. Stop keeping score. Stop tightening your grip on the grievance. Stop imagining that forgiveness is a limited commodity God expects us to ration carefully.
Jesus follows with the parable of a servant whose enormous debt is forgiven by his king, only to turn around and violently demand payment of a much smaller debt owed to himself. The contrast is intentionally jarring. Having received extraordinary mercy, the servant refuses to extend even a fraction of that mercy to another.
Yet, this parable is not an argument for ignoring harm or allowing ourselves to be abused. Matthew 18 has already made clear that wrongdoing should be named and confronted. Forgiveness and accountability belong together. Reconciliation does not require pretending nothing happened.
But injury tempts us to reduce people to their worst action. Once someone has been named as “the betrayer,” or “the enemy,” we can write them off, shame them publicly or decide they no longer deserve anything from us.
Donna Hicks’ work on dignity offers a helpful lens here. (See her book, Dignity: Its Essential Role in Resolving Conflict.) Hicks distinguishes dignity from respect. Dignity is inherent; every human possesses worth simply by being human. Respect, on the other hand, is earned or lost through our choices and behavior. I may lose respect for someone because of what they have done. I may strongly oppose their actions or refuse to trust them again. But their dignity does not disappear when they disappoint, anger or betray me.
Jesus challenges us to examine what happens inside us, how we dismiss the dignity of others when a grievance becomes part of our identity. Jesus calls his community toward something harder. Tell the truth about harm. Protect the vulnerable. Set necessary boundaries. Hold people accountable. But resist the temptation to deny another person’s humanity.
Everything in us resists this work. Avoidance is easier. So is resentment. Keeping score can feel good and fair.
But Jesus imagines the church as a community where conflict does not automatically end relationship, and wrongdoing does not have the final word. We confront because people matter. We forgive because people matter. We seek reconciliation because God is relentlessly reconciling us.
That may be the most challenging item on the church potluck menu. But it may also be the one we most need to learn how to share.
Questions for reflection on Matthew 18:21-35
- Where in your life are you keeping score, and what might it mean to hear Jesus’ invitation to “stop counting”?
- How can Christian communities practice accountability in ways that establish boundaries and name harm clearly while still honoring the dignity of everyone involved?
- What is the difference between forgiveness, reconciliation and restored trust? How might distinguishing among them help us respond more faithfully to conflict?
View the corresponding Order of Worship for the 24th Sunday in Ordinary Time.
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