by Paul A. Scaglione and John M. Mulder
Cascade Books, Eugene, Ore. 112 pages.
reviewed by Wayne A. Van Kampen
Placed between the Introduction (Paul: The Priest Who Listens) and the Conclusion (Listening to the Dying — An Interview of Paul A. Scaglione), each written by John M. Mulder, are fifteen honest-to-life narratives of individuals seeking a final sense of self-definition before God, needing God to know them in full-measure prior to their last breath on this earth. The introduction and conclusion are bonus blessings.
According to Pulitzer Prize-winning novelist Willa Cather, “There are only two or three human stories, and they go on repeating themselves as freely as if they had never happened before.” In many ways these are old, old stories that are strikingly new, dynamic, sometimes dramatic, accounts of individuals literally dying to be heard by another living and believing human being. The priest sits with and listens to the hurting heart longing now to embrace and be embraced by the truth that frees, redeems and restores. These are truth-telling stories. These are eternal stories.
Given my forty-three years of pastoral/clinical ministry, these stories touched a wide spectrum of remembering and reflection. Pastoral ministry begins by taking persons and their particular life circumstances seriously, being willing and able to relate to them in their conflicts, confusion, tension, sufferings, meanings and values. This happens not so much by doing something, but as the pastor is a genuine person in the relationship. An empathic relationship begins to unfold when people sense caring and compassion; as they feel heard, valued and respected they experience a sense of self-worth. The pastor seeks, by presence and action, in word and deed, to mediate a measure of God’s grace that embraces the pain and unfairness that is so much a part of the human experience. These stories bear witness to God’s grace.
Reading the narratives in this book was a thoughtful and sacramental experience for me. People desire more deeply to be heard, valued, and respected than to receive answers which may or may not be helpful in their given situations. The pastor is called to be with them in the honest reality of their faith and experience. Within such context, ministry in each of these stories is carried out trusting that God will — in some way, shape or fashion — bless the relational encounter of two human beings so that hope may emerge from discouragement, reconciliation from brokenness and life from a pervading sense of impending death. These accounts represent the redemptive reality of relational presence, attentive listening and truth-telling forgiveness.
I consider this book to be a substantial contribution to pastoral care literature, inviting cognitive, emotional and theological learning personally and professionally for everyone providing ministry to the living spirits of dying persons.
Wayne A. Van Kampen is the senior chaplain at University of Colorado Hospital.
