All is Calmish: How to Feel Less Frantic and More Festive During the Holidays

All is Calmish: How to Feel Less Frantic and More Festive During the Holidays
Niro Feliciano
Broadleaf, 205 pages
Published October 14, 2025

These days, I find joy in leading a group of parents through Traci Smith’s excellent Faithful Families. While their kids are in confirmation, we meet over lunch, imagining the values we hope to instill in our children and how to prioritize them within the busyness of family life.

Yesterday, as we reflected on the “most wonderful time of the year,” we recalled the joy of Advent and Christmas traditions that our families anticipate, while owning our own tendencies to set ourselves up for “failure.” I get it — determined to wring every bit of magic out of the season, I often over-commit, arriving at Christmas Eve more exhausted than inspired.

Social worker and therapist Niro Feliciano gets me. All is Calmish is her collection of family memories and stories, and the lessons learned along the way. Some are familiar (midnight present wrapping on Christmas Eve or the perfectly planned family outing that went awry) while others are life-changing (the Christmas celebrated weeks after her husband’s life-threatening brain bleed). Feliciano invites us to reframe our stressors, so that we may either recognize our blessings or give ourselves permission to make different choices. She offers gentle wisdom and practical guidance on holiday challenges, everything from addressing family conflicts to creating new traditions following the death of a loved one.

Feliciano concludes each chapter with “Baby, Stay Calm Inside:” simple questions to encourage mindfulness, and “Soul-Full Season” prompts are scattered throughout the book, offering deeper reflection for those seeking spiritual depth. She concludes with a sweet reflection on the first Christmas, as, according to Luke, Mary pondered the treasures of Jesus’ birth. “What exactly was she treasuring?” Feliciano wonders. “Whatever it was, in the midst of the mess, Mary found something beautiful. She held it close and thought about it often, perhaps remembering that even in the hardest moments, God shows up and miracles happen.”

All is Calmish is lighthearted, though Feliciano beautifully incorporates the very real challenges families face, and how they can be amplified at the holidays. Her compassionate tone may be just what we need during this hectic season.