As the associate pastor of spiritual formation in the congregation I serve, I consistently encourage congregants to practice rhythms (e.g. spiritual practices) that help them grow more and more like Jesus. I consistently hear from people that it’s hard to engage in spiritual practices – especially those perceived as more intense, like contemplative prayer or fasting. The number one reason these practices get ignored? Busyness and an already full life.
I know writing about busyness and the spiritual life is so common it has become cliché. However, four months ago, I gave birth to our first child and entered a new season of life – one that if not busier, has become noisier and more sleep deprived. Here’s the really interesting thing: while I’ve maintained certain disciplines and activities (like following my favorite television shows and exercising on a regular basis), I’ve had a much harder time engaging in spiritual disciplines.
Why is it so easy to make excuses for not praying or reading Scripture or observing Sabbath? Early in my son’s little life, I figured out that I had ready-made times for centering prayer every time I nursed him. But, my heart pulled toward filling the silence with episodes of “Friends” rather than sitting quietly in it, turning my intention to God. Flipping through articles in Parents magazine was far more appealing as I ate my breakfast than listening to Scripture (something I’ve done for years).
I have a hunch that the draw toward television and magazines is related to sleep deprivation. Praying and reading Scripture feel like work, while these leisure activities do not. Watching “Friends” requires nothing from me. Prayer and Scripture nudge me to turn my attention to God – to God’s love and grace, but also to God’s work to shape me into a new creation. I’m working hard to shape myself into a good parent; it’s overwhelming to think about becoming a new creation.
But isn’t that ironic? For what could be more spiritually forming than a massive life change like raising a child? Rather than feel guilty for not being more attentive to my spiritual life, I’ve asked myself, “What can I do within this life change to grow in Christlikeness?” How can I take spiritual practices that have nourished me and modify them to fit my new life rhythms?
So far, here is what I’ve come up with:
- I sing hymns to my son while rocking him to sleep;
- I set an alarm for 8:30 a.m. to pray for friends who are hurting;
- As often as I can, I return to my practice of listening to Scripture while eating breakfast. A colleague recently introduced me to the idea of praying while coloring. I purchased crayons and hope to take time (especially when my son is old enough to color) to engage in prayer and meditation while coloring.
In other words, I’ve found ways to turn my attention to God while still caring for my son.
This is what I hope my congregants would understand about spiritual formation: It is not “one size fits all.” Practices must change as our life rhythms change. But this doesn’t give us the excuse not to engage in the disciplines of the spiritual life. “Friends” might be a more attractive option for spending an evening, but in the long run, prayer is so much more powerful.
Rachel Young is the associate pastor of spiritual formation at Clear Lake Presbyterian Church, in Houston, Texas. She is married to Josh, who also serves on staff at Clear Lake Presbyterian as the director of contemporary worship and media.
