I am a young clergy woman in the PC(USA). For me, this is not just a description but an identity. I was ordained as a minister of Word and Sacrament on the day after my 27th birthday, which has made me significantly younger than nearly all my colleagues and parishioners. It’s not always been easy being the young one. So many times, I am the only female and/or person under 50 in a room. Many people have assumed I could only be a youth pastor and not a solo pastor to all ages. Others have only asked me to serve on committees because I’d bring down their average age requirements. One person told me they didn’t vote to hire me because I looked too young. Scores of people have said something like: “I didn’t know they let babies be pastors.”
I cannot speak for my male colleagues, but in my experience, the comments on my age have almost always been wrapped up in comments about my gender. For there have also been many people who have said, “Oh I didn’t know that church had a lady pastor.”
Over the years, I have learned to take the comments more gently than I did when I first began hearing them. Instead of reacting personally, I try to model grace. I try to understand the person’s context and faith background. Truthfully, for many, I am the first young female pastor they’ve ever met. I’ve come to learn that simply being who I am can be an avenue for others to understand the expanse of God’s love. Oftentimes when I make small talk with someone in a different setting (such as a hospital or playground or airplane), their shocked reaction to my profession can lead to deep conversations about life, faith and the call of God in our lives. I’ve come to understand that my identity speaks powerfully to how God works in beautiful ways through all people (regardless of age, gender, race, orientation, class, and so on).
The shift in reclaiming space as a young woman in ministry hasn’t been easy, and I have not done it alone. Instead, I’ve navigated these difficult spaces with the help of the Young Clergy Women International (YWCI) community. Founded in 2006, this online community is comprised only of clergy women under 40 and offers a safe place of support, fellowship and friendship. Here, I’ve found support for the many facets of my life as a pastor, preacher, teacher, spouse, mother and young woman. Being able to rejoice, grieve, laugh and lament with others just like me has greatly influenced the pastor, leader and person I am today.
Over the years, these experiences have re-shaped my ministry and identity. For I am no longer that young woman who was ordained at 27. I am, as my daughter ever so lovingly and cheekily said on my 40th birthday, “an old clergy woman.” When I turned 40 and left the YCWI group as per contract rules, I was unsure of my new identity. Am I a young-ish clergy woman? Or a middle-aged clergy woman? Or as my new online community graciously calls us: “young clergy women alumni”?
As my own identity shifts with a new decade, I hold on to the grace and support offered to me in my first 14 years of ordained ministry. I am longer facing many of the situations my younger colleagues face. While comments about age and gender have lessened for me, they haven’t for others. In this new space, I hope to model grace. I hope to offer a place of support. I hope to be inclusive and understanding of my younger colleagues’ insight, contributions and ministries, just as others were for me. I hope that our identities as God’s beloved children will always speak powerfully to the ways God works through each of us and all of us.
