Guest commentary by Arlene Gordon
In a recent sermon reflecting on racism, Eric D. Barreto said: “I’m tired, but I’m still awake. I’m tired, but I press on. But if I’m honest, I’m tired, and I want to stop. If I’m honest, I feel hopeless more than I care to admit.” I suppose that best describes my reaction to the recent churchwide conversation held Nov. 5-7 at Stony Point Center in Stony Point, New York. On the last day of the conversations, I shared my thoughts with a fellow pastor friend and we both agreed it was simply “more of the same, and not enough conversation and a plan for action.”
I believe the planning team worked hard to put together a dynamic conversation for the approximately 40 people present. The site was carefully selected to be sure we had sacred space and felt safe contributing to the conversation, and that was certainly a plus. The worship was very inspiring. The speakers were outstanding. Yet, I left the event feeling that there was not enough time for “real” conversations – and that was one of the reasons I had accepted the invitation to be a part of this discussion in the first place.
As one of the older invitees, I felt that the emphasis of the event was on the ingredients that make up the pie and did not leave room for the crust that contributes so significantly to the whole pie. I have always felt that Presbyterians in their intellectual cravings tend to gloss over the wealth of experience among them that makes the whole and I truly believe that a combination of both is necessary.
We had outstanding presenters in Eric D. Barreto, associate professor of New Testament at Luther Seminary in St. Paul, Minnesota, and Jennifer Harvey, professor of religion at Drake University in Des Moines, Iowa. As they presented, I wondered if they really understood how I was feeling after so many years of conversations, lectures and study – to see that we have made some progress, but truthfully, we are not distant enough from where we started. It is time for some change. It is time for us to move on to a new level of understanding and this will only happen when we are willing to engage in “real” conversation – that we are the same more than we are different.
The planning team was somewhat diverse. I noticed that two African-Americans on the planning team were not in attendance at the event nor was the African-American presenter, Tali Hairston present (although it was advertised that she would be). That raised eyebrows for me! Was the reason that the conversations were not as important on their list of priorities, or was there some other compelling reason not to be present? You see, I needed them to be there!
“Real conversation” is tough! The apostle Paul reminds us that the struggles of one become the struggles of all. Vice moderator, Larissa Kwong Abazia describes it well: “There is no perfect way to talk about racism. It’s going to be messy. People will get upset, long-standing beliefs will be disrupted, feelings will get hurt and it will feel safer to stop rather than wade through the pain.”
I was disappointed that there were not more “real” conversations – that there were not concrete steps to encourage our General Assembly, middle governing bodies, presbyteries and congregations to engage in some “real” conversations. To begin defining racism and unpacking the underlying causes and effects on lives. Even more complicated is the increasingly multifaceted picture of what was once known as black and white and that is no longer an accurate description of our current world we or the one we will face in the future.
It is with much thanksgiving that I was able to be a part of this event. However, “if I am honest, I’m tired and I want to stop. If I am honest, I feel hopeless more than I care to admit.” Nonetheless, I am choosing to press on to see what the end will be!
I believe that this cancer called “racism” can be defeated! It will not happen overnight. However, treating and eliminating it will provide a better future!
ARLENE W. GORDON was a participant at this conference. She currently serves as parish associate for the Korean Presbyterian Church of Miami in Cooper City, Florida.
